Puns
by BennieWaffles
Summary: They're in love, living happily together. She likes puns. He doesn't. Cute one-shot. Kplus. OOC. AH. AU. Clace. Trigger warning: character death.


**Puns**

 **Sum: They're in love, living happily together. She likes puns. He doesn't. Cute one-shot. Kplus. OOC. AH. AU. Clace. Trigger warning: character death.**

 **A/N: I'm back. I wrote this partially on my phone, in OneNote, and now I have to type everything again because OneNote fucked things up when I tried to copy it into Word. Yay.**

 **I like puns and you can find so many funny and cute ones when you just google 'romantic puns'. Thank you, Holy Waffle, for Google.**

 **I could've never come up with these puns.**

 **I wrote this partially at my grandma's birthday party, but I'm unsocial little shit no one pays attention to, so I was in the clear. Anyone else?**

 **Enjoy reading :)**

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They were finally working on a bench to put in the hall. They had bought the house a week ago, decorated every single room, but the hall was left awfully bare. So, they decided to put in a self made bench.

Jace was quite wealthy as a well known singer-songwriter and Clary as an artist.

Many people loved Jace's music, but he wanted to take a break to settle in and decorate, some time for himself with his wife.

They were a famous ship, #clace always being in the top ten trending hashtags. They were proud.

But, they feared the power of the media as the new top trending tag was #clacebaby, since Clary accidentally mentioned that they planned to have kids in an interview.

''Hey, Jace?'' He could practically hear the grin in her voice.

He sighed, yet there was a smile on his face. He turned around to look at her. ''Yes, babe?''

She smiled innocently, holding up a box of nails and a hammer.

''I want to nail you.''

He facepalmed, a smack echoing through the bare hall.

...

...

...

The pun thing slowly became a game for her as she realized he had a serious dislike towards them. She lived for romantic puns and would forever tease him with them.

They were sitting in Taki's waiting in line for their coffee.

Jace had a sweet tooth, always going for lattes or coffee with too much sugar.

She didn't understand how such a perfect human being could have such an atrocious taste in coffee. But she loved him anyway.

She went for completely black coffee, like her soul.

The lady behind the counter called her name and she scooted forward to retrieve her coffee gratefully.

She brought it to the booth where Jace was already sitting.

He smiled at her, letting his eyes travel over her body.

She blushed a bit.

He always did that, she assumed so that her confidence would be boosted a bit.

She put his muffin down in front of him, sitting next to him with both the coffees in her hand.

He dove into the muffin.

She grinned, intentionally turning the label that said 'latte' in fancy writing to him.

She put down her coffee, putting her hand under his chin and turning his head to her.

''Hmm?'' He hummed through his muffin.

''I like you a latte.''

He set his muffin down, took a deep breath—and facepalmed very loudly, before taking his coffee from her hand.

The woman in the booth behind them cackled.

...

...

...

He was in the recording studio. After a month, they'd settled in quite nicely and had had enough time for the two of them, so now it was time for Jace to start writing some songs again.

He was widely popular with the female population, not many guys showing appreciation for his songs, but a few did.

At least half the songs he had written were about Clary, if not all of them.

He loved her, every single thing about her.

Even her stupid puns.

He vowed to himself that he would never think them funny, never laugh at them, never smile.

He would not let her win this little game.

They were texting back and forth, after all, he'd been in the studio for four hours now.

She eventually sent him a photo of one of her latest, nearly finished works.

It was a golden snake.

He did not see the sentence she sent after that until at least two minutes later, because he was occupied with admiring her beautiful work.

He facepalmed, loudly, when he did read it.

His manager looked at him with a questioning gaze.

 **I hiss you were here. –C**

...

...

...

A year later, they were finally throwing a party, because they hadn't seen each other in a long time.

They really called everyone over because they wanted to announce something.

Everyone came in around 07.00, after them the bell rang, announcing the delivery guy.

Jace handed one of the pizzas to Clary, so she could start eating.

He shoved the pizza guy some cash before taking over the giant tower of pizza boxes from him.

He shut the front door and stumbled into the living room, trying not to let them fall.

Alec came over to help him, but Clary pulled the attention to herself.

''Hey, Jace.'' She was grinning.

He was too distracted by the pile of pizza boxes to notice her pun trap.

''You have a pizza my heart.''

Everyone laughed, looking at the couple with adoration.

''Hey, Alec, come over here and slap my forehead, will you?''

So he did, a loud smack sounding through the room.

After almost everyone was done with their pizza, Jace stood up to announce something.

''So, everyone. We have something to announce.''

''Are you getting divorced? I will cut you.'' Isabelle threatened.

He rolled his eyes. ''No, it's actually _good_ news.''

''Tell us already.'' Magnus was clearly excited.

''Well—'' Jace started, but Clary interrupted him.

''I might be pregnant.'' She mumbled through a mouthful of pizza.

Izzy shrieked, deafening everyone for a second.

She ran to Jace, hugging him.

'' _You're gonna be a dad before you're 30!''_

He was currently 29 years old, Clary being the young one at 24.

He laughed.

...

...

...

Magnus and Alec decided to treat Clary to a zoo day for her 30th birthday.

She loved the zoo.

Her favorite part was the lion den.

As they arrived there, Clary giddily announced:

''It's like a group of wild Jace's!''

Magnus laughed.

Clary came over to Jace, hugging his right arm to her. ''But I managed to tame this one myself.''

Jace's favorite part were the tigers, for the exact same reason as Clary's.

They eventually got to the otters, one of Clary's other favorites.

She didn't say why though, but he found out soon enough.

She dragged him to the glass fence, looking down into the pond of otters.

''Hey, Jace?''

 _Oh, god_.

He sighed. ''Yes, dear?''

''I am otterly in love with you.''

He facepalmed, but couldn't help but think that, indeed, that was a good one.

...

...

...

Clary and Jace finally had a night to themselves. The first of many.

Their son Max, at a whopping twenty years old, finally moved out. He now lived in a gorgeous apartment with his girlfriend.

Jace and Clary were on the old side now, Jace at 49 and Clary at 44.

She was still as gorgeous to him as the day they met.

Her red hair was still as vibrant, her bright green eyes still as giddy and energetic.

They were cooking together. Since the day they moved in together, they had cooked every meal and baked every good together, unless one of them couldn't make it.

They were going for an old fashioned meal, very basic.

Green beans, mashed potatoes and steak.

Was in charge of mashing the potatoes and she would cook the beans.

She poured the beans into a pan with boiling water, catching one bean before it fell.

She held it up, grinning.

Jace looked at her with one eyebrow raised.

''We were meant to bean.''

He rolled his eyes, shaking his head at her. She laughed.

Secretly, when she wasn't looking, he smiled to himself.

...

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...

Another ten years later, they still did almost everything together.

He loved her, endlessly. When he thought back, he couldn't help but be absolutely shocked that Isabelle ever suspected that they would get divorced.

Not once, during any fight, had he thought of seperating her.

He loved her too much.

Their fights were useless most of the time, about small things that he couldn't remember the day after.

As they got older, they fought no more.

They just loved.

They laughed together at their inside jokes, they kissed and snuggled in the night, they sat before the fireplace, Clary falling asleep while he read to her.

He knew she enjoyed his insanely deep voice. He had always had a deep voice, but as he grew older his voice grew even deeper.

They were baking cookies together, smiling and laughing, throwing flour at each other like they always did.

She took some butter on her finger, smearing it on his nose while smiling lovingly.

''You're my butter half.'' She said, grinning.

He chuckled, before swooping in for a kiss.

She moved her head away as he leaned towards her lips, his instead landing on her cheek.

He leaned back.

''What's wrong, Spitfire?''

A tear fell from her eye, rolling down her cheek. He wiped it away with his thumb, frowning. He didn't want her to be sad.

''My test came back today...''

His heart fell down to his stomach.

''I have lung cancer.''

He closed his eyes, taking a deep breath to calm himself before leaning down and hugging her.

He never wanted to let go.

...

...

...

She had been battling the deathy disease for over ten years now.

He woke up to hear her coughing. He pat her back lovingly, whispering sweet nothings.

At first, she fell silent for a bit, before she made a choking noise and started coughing frantically.

He grabbed the phone from the bedside table, calling the alarmnumber.

As he sat at her side in the ambulance, she looked at him, tears in her eyes.

She whispered. ''You take my breath away.''

He laughed, but as he laughed and laughed more, tears started to fall.

He was sobbing against her hand.

He loved her.

He couldn't let go, not yet.

...

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...

She spent a week in the hospital.

He spent every night by her side.

Until one night.

She woke him up, shaking his head with her hand on his jaw.

''Jace, my darling.''

She was coughing.

It was time.

He smiled at her.

''Yes, dear?''

''I love you, so much.'' She was crying.

He didn't want her to cry, but he had to admit, he was crying, too.

''I love you to death.'' He joked.

She smiled at him, her eyes holding as much love as humanly possible.

Before the line went dead, a long endless beep sounding through the room.

He didn't call a nurse, he didn't call a doctor or anyone.

He just stared at her as her last breath left her body.

He didn't close her eyes, instead he stared at those green orbs for as long as he could before they lost any sign of life or energy that they usually held.

When he was ready to let her go, he closed her eyes with his fingers, before he shut his eyes himself.

Never to wake up again.

His son found him like that.

Max smiled as he saw their hands intertwined, still.

Their love was a special one.

 **A/N: I'm crying. Sorry, but I just felt like giving it this ending.**

 **Fav, review. This one, I actually have a good feeling about.**

 **Check out my other one-shots, they're quite good.**

 **I hope I didn't make you cry.**

 **Or, I do. I don't know.**

 **Tell me if you cried XD**

 **Waffles out.**


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